Hmm...writing tips people?

I have a few thoughts. First off, I'd consider limiting the use of parentheses. They work as an interruption to the reader and can take the reader 'out' of the story. Usually anything in parentheses can work as a stand alone sentence. Secondly, I'd consider changing the word 'smug' when you are talking about Jason at the end of this piece. The word has a negative connotation, which is why it works with the other character, Ahaana. I don't think you want a negative label with a character who looks like he's going to be the hero. I'd suggest playing with something to replace that word with. Think about what you want to accomplish with the smile. Is he pleased he could help her? Another thought is to do away with the smile completely. It's overused in writing anyway, and most people use it as an easy out instead of putting more thought into facial expressions. Could he be puzzled by her terse response? Afraid he's hurt her feelings? Or how about touch? Could he touch her desk top with fingertips as he goes by? See how you can change the whole interaction simply by changing a smile to something more interesting? Third, I agree with some of the other answers here that my first thought was this was another Twilight story. Mainly because the internet seems swamped with Twilight wanabees. Plus, your phrase about his super human brain made me think that. Since you've received similar feedback on the Twilight connection from more than one person I'd suggest also looking at changing the phrase that is making people target Twilight. You could simply delete the super charged brain phrase and use something else like that shows more of both characters. Try something like her wondering why he can be so smart at math when he's so bad at...some other course in school, some sport, talking to kids, etc. Or use it as a way to show a character trait of hers, as in, he's as good at math as she is at winning drag races or endurance horse trials...whatever is a strong character point for her. And finally, you have a good writing voice that is individual, and you have a great humor that is subtle and comes through in the character's thoughts. I'd strongly suggest you keep writing and working this piece. Remember to give readers something to care about with these characters. As in, what conflicts, internal and external, do they have? Readers want to cheer a character on, boo and hiss for the antagonist, and root for the protagonist to grow by the end of the story. That holds true for all the characters. Oh, and make sure the plot doesn't turn into a cliche school romance. Give the readers more than that. Sorry for the long answer, but keep going and good luck.