WHY Do I Help My Friend When She Throws It Back In My Face? Please help!.....?

I think you have to realise that she doesn't want to completely shut off her family. She wants to forget about the past and ignore it and be apart of a happy family since she couldn't in her childhood. I'm not saying this is the right or wrong choice for her to take but it's the one she's taken. What I think you should do is probably let her do that. You've done what you can to help her and she's rejected it so it's her problem that she can sort out by herself if she won't accept the help. You can live in the knowledge that you've done your best to help someone out.